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Tuesday, 7 February 06 :: can't focus

i can't focus today. trying, hard. making to do lists and kinda getting through them. *sigh* but my mind is on something else, and setting up time to chat with someone. anyhow.

dad is starting radiation tommorrow. 48 treatments? anyhow, i'm glad this time hasn't brought the flood of tears that last time did. i think last time he went through this i was just starting to wrap my head around that dad has cancer, this time i've been able to see him rececently, and he does look good. and he's still working and all that. but, i think getting to see him really made the difference between these radiation treatments and the last one. but even so, and even so dad is super healthy, i wouldn't object to good thoughts being sent his way, good thoughts that this could do what the docs all say it won't do -- not just about managing the illness but killing it all. i know, a girl can hope, can't she?

anyhow, all this radiation treatment, well it makes me think about the fact that i've not heard from georgia yet. while i love eugene, and its home, if i get into georgia dad's illness will be a heavy weight for me to go -- beyond the fact that its just a great program. dad says that the docs all say that this cancer will eventually kill him.. and if it gets bad, i'd like to be on the east coast with him. but, no one really knows.

anyhow.

focus. yeah, its about focus, eh? gotta go do it.

posted by brooke at February 7, 2006 12:24 PM

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about
i'm brooke, born in '73. i am currently a phd student in instructional technology. this is the blog where i capture all the neurotic, and the few non-neurotic, moments that seem to come with being a phd student (if you want to read less neuroses and more professionalism go to: oer's, dl's, reuse and culture: it's about a phd student researching digital resources in a multicultural world). i have been from eugene, oregon for a long time.. 8 years specifically (its my home now, but i grew up in southwestern virginia), but now i'm here in logan, utah at utah state university. after finding my roots in eugene i never could have expected that i would leave that liberal oasis and head to utah. but i did and there are days when its a blessing and days when i'm tempted to go back to oregon and beg the folks at lost valley educational center to let me move in. but i won't leave because there are days when this process is better than any kind of high i could ever imagine. what else? i collect things, i have 2 cats, 2 kayaks, 2 laptops (i'm a geek - one mac, one pc). i can be emailed at brookesblog@rivervision.com.