rivervision - since election day of 2000.

Tuesday, 26 July 05 :: hot. damn hot.

its 77.9 degrees at 11.12pm in eugene oregon. for those without air conditioning -- who's offices are also without air conditioning (and windows) -- its really freakin' hot in the middle of the day.

*sigh*

i wish i had something thoughtful to write here. i used to have those kind of posts, and people enjoyed reading them.. but i don't have them anymore.. i go about my day just moving from one thing to another, trying to keep my head above water. i don't have deep thoughts about anything these days, mostly panicked thoughts about what i need to be doing -- and wistful thoughts about what i wish i were doing.

i guess you could say i'm content for the first time ever. fairly. i do have things that will bring up some serious tears, i do have serious longings for certain things.. but i don't dwell on those things in my daily life.

really. my life these days is about -- gre studying procrastion, getting enough sleep, working at my hard job for an introvert, thinking about how many signatures we've gotten at work and where i'm going to get my next volunteer, pondering the state of my friendships, thinking about my family, my dad's cancer, my aunt and her cancer, my nephew, the cats, getting enough sleep, everything i need to be doing for things not work, staying sane, thinking about when the next heart of now weekend is (and when i'll get to spend 3 nights sleeping SO wonderfully in my little dorm room at lvec), and getting enough sleep.

see? nothing deep. i check the news, but frankly it disturbs me. i simply can't dwell so much in the bad news.. YES, I know i'm an organizer.. I KNOW i'm supposed to know what is going on.. but dammit, if i read about it every day i'll just be depressed. i'll organize the people, someone else tell them what to say. fair?

see. nothing deep, or thoughtful. and thusly, i bore myself.. and no one reads this.. but really, this blog is for me.. and if you read it-- thats ducky.. if you don't -- thats ducky too.

oh wait! but tommorrow i talk to someone about something i've been wanting to do for awhile now. i'm not sure if i'll get to do it, but we'll see.. if i do get to do it, maybe i'll just get gutsy enough to share my thoughts on it in this blog.. (and then things might just really get exciting around here! ha!)

posted by brooke at July 26, 2005 11:12 PM

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about
i'm brooke, born in '73. i am currently a phd student in instructional technology. this is the blog where i capture all the neurotic, and the few non-neurotic, moments that seem to come with being a phd student (if you want to read less neuroses and more professionalism go to: oer's, dl's, reuse and culture: it's about a phd student researching digital resources in a multicultural world). i have been from eugene, oregon for a long time.. 8 years specifically (its my home now, but i grew up in southwestern virginia), but now i'm here in logan, utah at utah state university. after finding my roots in eugene i never could have expected that i would leave that liberal oasis and head to utah. but i did and there are days when its a blessing and days when i'm tempted to go back to oregon and beg the folks at lost valley educational center to let me move in. but i won't leave because there are days when this process is better than any kind of high i could ever imagine. what else? i collect things, i have 2 cats, 2 kayaks, 2 laptops (i'm a geek - one mac, one pc). i can be emailed at brookesblog@rivervision.com.