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Wednesday, 12 October 05 ::
rural girl
i grew up in rural southwestern Virginia. in the mountains. the very first home i ever lived in was a big ol' farm house about 15 miles outside of the small college town that we used as our town of residence. my brother and i spent our days growing up romping around the fields that surrounded the house, playing at the stream across the road, jumping in the haybales in the barn across the road. we lived in the house of p mountain farm, an actual working farm. i don't know why paul sold the house part, but he did and my parents bought it after my dad got his ph.d. from another college town in virginia.
after divorcing, and finding new partners, both of my parents eventually found themselves, and us, back in the country. my mom was down in the valley, my dad was up on the mountain. i always dispised the living out.. i couldn't drive and was simply too far away from my friends. i swore up and down that i'd never ever live rurally. ever.
so, i didn't. i grew up and moved out. my first stop was an even smaller more rural college town, with a teensy tiny college.. then i was off to the big city of atlanta. i loved atlanta. i loved being able to walk too the bookstore! to the bar! i loved the energy of the city. i loved that everything and everyone was so close together.. and while i also simply adored piedmont park, that it was in the middle of a bustling city made it even better.
eventually i found myself out here in oregon. and i fell in love again, with this smallish city. it seemed to be the perfect meld of my rural roots and my urban early - mid twenties. easy to get around, i could bike to the grocery store, culture.. but no traffic. *and* the access to the rural area was pretty simple. either go hike up the butte or just drive 15 minutes and there i was.
last year i found myself working on a very rural campaign. our biggest city was a small city/town to the south of me. around 4,000 people to be exact. fewer than in all of the city council ward that i live in. i got to spend sometime away from the campaign office, and actually out in the district. i remember my first drive out there i found myself having a feeling of home. i went to a fundraiser and for the first time in a long time i sensed that i could breathe. i mean, the familiarity of the rural area was something that dug at something very deep inside.
over the last 5 months i've been lucky enough to have ties to a place that is also in rural oregon. when i go out there, as i've written here, i've found myself being able to breathe. and sleep. and slow down. and i know a lot of my attraction is the place, but i also know that a lot of the attraction to the place is that it is rural. that that place i felt being dug at deep inside last year, well, the ground has been opened and that place has started to come up for air.
i've always said that once i find a partner that i want to move back out to the rural areas. its where i was born and bred. its where i spent my life defining the core of who i am. its where there is space, and silence. its where i can slow down and be deliberate.
i'm supposed to be going out and taking a friend to lost valley tommorrow. its another moment where i can't wait to get out there.. and not just because of who is there --- although it does help that i'll get to see people i know -- but its also because the freedom my heart feels when i get away from the city. my heart knows that it belongs out where there is space and air. my heart knows that the rural oregon is where it belongs. my heart knows that although it was born in virginia and will always have a kinship there, that rural oregon is the place it has finally found after searching for so long. i just hope that i can concede to its wishes one day and make its dreams of living at home come true.
posted by brooke at October 12, 2005 09:01 PM
